Honestly, i’ve been trying to write something for some time now. But somehow i have found it very hard to do. I think i wrote almost about everything, so its not easy to find something new to write. Call it writer’s block, i my self call it like that.
I did spend a great deal of moments lately. Something i’d been craving for. I feel so open, so vulnerable. And what actually makes us feel somfortable about someone? Why cant we feel it with just anybody?
“i dont need someone who wants to do everything for me. I need someone who makes me confortable”, i once said to her while we were drinking coffee. I ordered the-usual-cappucino, she ordered caramel latte.
A friend said that there were 5 love expressions. 5 ways love can be transfered from one to another. And everyone has their own type, their own preference about how they love and how the want to be loved. But this is where the problem begins.
I dont think i remember all 5. But let me try.
- Some people show their love by saying words about love, writing something about love.
- Some people say it by having a quality time together, even when its just sitting quietly drinking that bitter machiato, watching the night by the seaside, talking about everything.
- Some show it with touch. They transfered their love with every touch they give, their kisses.
- Some say it with presents and things. Here’s where flowers, golden rings, luxury food, and all that speaks.
- Some show it with care, with being every thing their partners need. They devote to their loved ones.
Its not that a way is better than another. You can have your own way. Your partners can have their own way. The problem is: do you know how your partners want to be loved?
Most of us expect to be loved like how they loved. For example, A likes to be fooled with sweet words, and A shows his/her love with a bunch of sweet words. But B, his/her partner feel that he/she is loved when he/she is given something, so that he/she often give A presents. For B, words are useless and he/she is disappointed because A hasnt given him/her anything for their aniversary but words! For A, presents is a waste. A does feel that a lot of presents means a lot of money, and A believes that money has nothing to do with love, but words are different. So A is disappointed with how superficial B thinks, and B is disapppointed with how stingy A. And they break up.
See how destructive it is?
My friend said because of that, we must understand how our partners want to be treated (and maybe show how we want to be treated). But its never that simple, isnt it? Maybe thats the reason why people sometime stuck with someone. And thats the reason why we cant be with just anybody. The chemistry, the will to change, the will to understand…
Enough said, i sppose..